The Monogamy Virus
Humans had spent centuries debating love, fidelity and freedom; Krishna, a cat, had already reached a conclusion.
Krishna was not an ordinary cat.
His full name was Tensor Krishnan Iyer.
Nobody had named him that. He had simply arrived with the name.
He was black, except for a white patch under his chin. He ate only when he wanted to. Slept wherever he wanted to. And looked at human beings with the mild disappointment of a retired scientist.
Every evening at 7:13, he watched the news.
He did not understand Tamil. He did not understand English. But he understood humans.
That was when I first noticed the pattern.
The HIV epidemic had returned.
Not the old epidemic. Medicine had changed that.
ART could suppress the virus. People could live normal lives. Transmission could be drastically reduced. Even infected mothers could have uninfected babies.
The virus had lost its teeth.
But humans had lost their fear.
Infections among young people were rising again.
The newspapers blamed social media.
Social media blamed dating apps.
Dating apps blamed freedom.
Freedom blamed nobody.
Krishna watched all this from the sofa.
“Interesting,” I told him.
He scratched his ear.
“People know the risk. Still they do it.”
Krishna looked at me.
There are some looks cats give you which are difficult to translate.
I looked back.
“Don’t judge me,” I said.
He blinked.
This one meant:
Humans have always known the risk.
The scientists then found something more interesting.
The virus was changing.
It wasn’t becoming more lethal.
It was becoming selective.
If a person had many partners, the virus multiplied faster.
If the person had one stable partner, it became almost dormant.
The finding was published in Nature.
The headline in the newspaper was simpler:
VIRUS MAY ENCOURAGE MONOGAMY
For three days, everybody laughed.
Then people stopped laughing.
Marriage registrations increased.
Dating apps started asking:
“Are you currently exclusive?”
Matrimonial sites began advertising:
“Healthy relationship. Healthy life.”
Governments quietly promoted stable partnerships.
Insurance companies offered discounts to married couples.
Priests became public-health workers.
Epidemiologists became relationship counsellors.
Human civilisation had finally discovered a way to make monogamy fashionable.
Krishna remained unimpressed.
One Sunday, I found him watching two pigeons sitting together on the balcony.
“See?” I said.
“Monogamy.”
He looked at the pigeons.
Then at me.
Then he walked away.
Six years later, HIV infections had fallen to almost zero.
The virus had not been eradicated.
It had simply become harmless.
Humanity celebrated.
There were documentaries.
Awards.
A Nobel Prize.
One scientist said:
“Perhaps nature has found a way to teach humans fidelity.”
That evening, Krishna was sleeping on my laptop.
I moved him.
Something fell from his collar.
A small silver disc.
There was no battery.
No manufacturer.
Just four letters:
TKI-7
I touched it.
The laptop screen came alive.
A scientific report appeared.
No author.
No institution.
No date.
Just one line:
SUBJECT: HUMAN SOCIAL NETWORK — SUCCESSFUL MODIFICATION
I read it twice.
Below that:
VIRAL VECTOR: HIV
My mouth went dry.
Another line appeared.
DESIRED HUMAN BEHAVIOUR: MONOGAMY
I slowly looked at Krishna.
He opened one eye.
The screen changed.
SECONDARY OBJECTIVE: REDUCE HUMAN INTERACTION.
Then:
FINAL OBJECTIVE: PROTECT FELIS CATUS FROM HUMANITY.
I stared at the cat.
“Krishna…”
He yawned.
The screen displayed one final message.
PHASE TWO BEGINS TOMORROW.
I waited.
Another line appeared.
TARGET: CATS.
Krishna sat up.
For the first time, he looked worried.
Then he looked at me.
I understood.
“Don’t worry,” I said.
“I won’t tell anyone.”
Krishna purred.
After all, we had lived together for years.
That was the problem.
We were already monogamous.
Krishna looked at me.
For the first time in five years, he smiled.
At least, I think he did.
Cats don’t smile.
They have something much more sophisticated.
They make you believe they do.
Reference
Why Karnataka Is Holding HIV Camps In Colleges After 7,000+ Young People Tested Positive
Over 56,000 in Karnataka unaware of HIV status; dating apps pose new challenge to tracing infections